Let the Games Begin
The Winter Olympics may be fast approaching, but they have nothing on the Cocoa & Comfort activities organized by Samaritan’s Healing Hearts bereavement team for their most recent half-day grief support group. As families arrived, they gathered at separate tables to enjoy breakfast before the day’s activities, yet by the end of the day, families – both parents and children – will be intermingling and chatting, connected by their shared experience – navigating familial loss.
There’s something for everyone at Healing Hearts, with activities led by bereavement specialists, including age-specific breakout groups for the children and a separate group for adults. The day’s first order of business was to shake it off! A Winter Olympics themed activity got everyone moving with target practice using “winter snowballs”, swimming in simulated pools, and skating for gold, using yoga moves that taught everyone self-soothing tools. The vision of bereavement experts Gopi and Shannon came to life and left everyone relaxed and ready to take on the day.
Communication & Practical Tools
When asked to share what they learned that day, one child said, “My feelings are good.” Another shared, “Never keep your emotions in.” A key goal of the group is to help children and adults know that it is ok to talk about grief and loss. “There can sometimes be reluctance to talk about emotions at home, but having this environment can take away some of the fears about discussing grief,” says Lisa Delgado, Samaritan Bereavement Program Supervisor.
As a group, the attendees watched scenes from the movie Coco that highlighted just how powerful communicating about grief with family members can be. In it, they saw a grandmother and a grandchild bond over memories of a loved one who had passed, and the positive impact it had for the entire family.
Next, families made cocoa bombs, adding toppings to a bag of cocoa to represent different emotions. Participants created their own mix using peppermint for excitement and caramel chips for sadness while talking about where those emotions came from.
From there, everyone split into groups to participate in age-appropriate activities identifying emotions. The young children worked with the bereavement team to create a memory jar for their loved one; the middle-aged children used card games to identify their emotions, made family playlists, and wrote to their future selves. These letters will be mailed to them a year from now, allowing them to see the evolving nature of grief.
The adults also got together to decorate frames for photos of their loved one. Guided by the bereavement facilitators, the activity gave them time to connect and talk about the challenges of being a parent while grieving.
When the group comes back together everyone has talked about their feelings, and now it’s time to remember traditions. Together families decorate aprons and discuss the traditions of their family and the memories of those traditions with their loved ones who have passed.
Community is Key
The day is a success not because the grief no longer exists, but because families leave with models and prompts for how to talk about their emotions. They also leave with connections to others that make the journey feel less lonely.
Just like the Olympics, Cocoa & Comfort proves that we can learn from one another when we come together as a community.